PUPPYKNUCKLES
  • Home
  • Shoots
  • Curbside Cars
  • Mustang USA
  • What Is A Puppyknuckle
  • Contact
  • Portfolio
PUPPYKNUCKLES
PUPPYKNUCKLES
  • Home
  • Shoots
  • What Is A Puppyknuckle
  • Portfolio
  • NYIAS 2015

The Mercedes-Benz GLE450 AMG Is One Chubby Ass Sports Car

  • April 6, 2015

From Mercedes-Benz’ press release for the new 2016 GLE450 AMG Coupe: Compared to a riding lawnmower, the GLE450 AMG Coupe is a true sports car, and as long as the grass isn’t wet, will be nearly as capable offroad.  Self-assured presence in the Nordstrom’s parking lot is standard equipment.

Wait, I’m sorry, that’s just what it says between the lines.  The real press release says funny things like:  GLE Coupe displays attributes typical of coupes such as sportiness, dynamism and agility, while also exuding the self-assured presence, versatility and ruggedness of an SUV.

I admit I haven’t drank the luxury sports crossover Kool Aid yet; maybe there really is something about having a fast-ish sort-of-truck that is a perverse joy.  But it seems to me that if you are going to build a monster, you can’t just go halfway.  I want my rolling oxymoron to be relentlessly stupid and powerful enough to overcome any rational thoughts, like a Saturn V rocket breaking the pull of Earth’s gravity.

Unfortunately, the GLE Coupe doesn’t look like it’s going to be able to cash the check those AMG badges are writing.  The list of things the GLE450 AMG cannot do is going to be much longer than the list about what it does well.  It might have nearly 400 ft-lbs of torque, which is a good deal more than the BMW X6, but it’s going to need all of it to get those huge 22 inch wheels rolling.

 

Click on any picture to open the gallery view:

  • Mercedes-AMG-GL450-dw-burnett-puppyknuckles-8728
  • Mercedes-AMG-GL450-dw-burnett-puppyknuckles-8724
  • Mercedes-AMG-GL450-dw-burnett-puppyknuckles-8738
  • Mercedes-AMG-GL450-dw-burnett-puppyknuckles-8714
  • Mercedes-AMG-GL450-dw-burnett-puppyknuckles-8742
  • Mercedes-AMG-GL450-dw-burnett-puppyknuckles-8737
  • Mercedes-AMG-GL450-dw-burnett-puppyknuckles-8715
Next Article
  • NYIAS 2015

Nice And Clean: Detail Photos Of The 2015 Audi R8 V10

  • April 6, 2015
View Post
Previous Article
  • NYIAS 2015
  • Racing Stuff

BMW Brought Some Rather Nice Race Cars To NYIAS

  • April 6, 2015
View Post
More Stuff
View Post
  • Shoots

Everything’s Perfect in a McLaren 720S Spider on CA-33

  • February 27, 2020
View Post
  • Shoots

2020 McLaren GT In New York

  • February 15, 2020
View Post
  • Shoots

Amboy, We Meet Again

  • December 16, 2019
View Post
  • Shoots

Roadtripping the Nissan Italdesign GT-R50

  • October 25, 2019
View Post
  • Shoots

Old RUF, Meet the New RUF

  • October 15, 2019
View Post
  • Shoots

Fernando Alonso’s McLaren MP4-22 Formula One Car

  • September 16, 2019
View Post
  • Shoots

Corvette C8 for Top Gear

  • August 20, 2019
View Post
  • Shoots

Lotus Eleven and Peter Egan

  • August 3, 2019

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

PUPPYKNUCKLES
Blog of automotive photographer DW Burnett

Input your search keywords and press Enter.